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Strength In Weakness

“The only person I’m trying to be better than is the person I was yesterday.”


 

Yesterday I stopped at Biggby for a coffee treat after my husband’s follow up doctor’s appointment.
This was my cup cozy message.

My husband had a serious car accident on Tuesday, requiring an ambulance ride to the hospital in a neck brace.

Praise God he is ok with no internal injuries, no broken bones, no head injury. He does have back and neck pain from whiplash. And, he has some muscle pain in his braking pedal leg.

I’m well aware and don’t need to be reminded of how thankful I need to be that this wasn’t worse.

I cleaned out our oh so likely totaled van Tuesday afternoon.

Our van debris picked up off the street by….someone. I found this when I went to gather our personal belongs and our new mailbox post out of the van later Tuesday.

Believe me.

I need no reminders.

This is the least alarming post accident photo. It says enough.

I don’t know how they got my husband safely out of the van. The driver’s side door barely opens. The windshield is bowed and is not actually in the window frame. The van body shape is no longer a rectangle shape, more like a parallelogram,trapezoid or rhombus. Not that I got the tape measure out and analyzed angles or anything. I mean, it’s not like I use geometry in my every day life, right? <insert sarcastic but healing humor here>

For the 48+ hours after the accident we’ve been in a literal brain fog, for two different reasons. His fog because of the literal accident, mine because of his accident and the realization of what worse could have looked like.

It was enough that I got called to the scene of the accident and where the fog began to crowd my peripheral vision. It’s where I began to pretend I was strong. A fireman asked me if I was ok when I climbed out of the ambulance where hubby was waiting for me with the police and EMT’s. I said “I will be. I have to be. Yes. I’m ok.” and tried to convince myself that I’d be strong.

In the ER my mother in law was talking about how strong I was, how much peace was in my countenance. Inside I was thinking “What is she talking about? I can barely think.” It was an out of body experience. A tunnel visioned fog with no peripheral vision. I could only tunnel in on one minute at a time.

Inside my head and hurting heart was turmoil, not peace.

On Tuesday we took “things” minute by minute as we ticked through the day…neck brace, ambulance ride, traffic citation, calling family, employment, and our pastor, CT scans and X-rays, and the results of those. Getting pain meds filled, coming home to comfort children, more phone calls to family, follow up doctors’ appointments made, cleaning out the van, and answering messages and offers of help.

Fog.

Tick-tock…minute by minute.

Once home, my focus was only on making sure my husband was ok, and making sure my children were ok.

None of us were ok. Yet we were.

We were home together, we were on the phone with our oldest in the Boston area.

There was some laughter. We did crack jokes.

We were <mostly> ok.


Wednesday we took it hour by hour as emotions began to flood and we left room for processing events and comforting each other, planning, insurance calls, finishing our taxes believe it or not, answering more messages, the list of things to do got long but things were being checked off in spite of the continued, but slowly dissipating fog. Hour by hour…


 

Thursday the day formed into compartmentalized sections. I could think a little more ahead and make plans. I even could begin to think about Friday and Saturday.

“Do I have a show Saturday? I wasn’t sure. I should find out. I should begin to pull stuff together if I do.”

The Thursday morning doctor’s appointment brought some reassuring and good news results! Yay! I brought hubby to work to teach his class (poor guy!), stopped for coffee, did some mental health processing, and finally had a good cry alone in the Biggby parking lot. We had to reschedule pick up of rental car, and I had to be home to clean up our bedroom for a mattress delivery that was actually scheduled two weeks ago! (GOD!), take care of more things, and go to our second follow up appointment. I don’t mess around with getting those health and healing affairs in order, even in fog and fatigue.

I intended to come home, make said new bed and fall into it after that second appointment.

But our chickens had gotten naughty and created a new plan. And that was God too. It was therapy to go enjoy the fresh air and their antics, and I’m thankful for that. I also enjoyed an unplanned visit from a sweet friend who dropped off dinner, which I also didn’t know I really needed (more God!), and I enjoyed a two mile walk listening to peeper frogs and singing birds.

By Thursday night the fog was lifting. I could feel strength returning in the ending day, in spite of fatigue. And I know the fog lifting is from the prayers of others.


Friday morning I awoke on my new mattress, having slept like a rock, and finally not quite so tired. I’d dreamed about chicken antics, some of them featherless and looking rough.

Kind of like how I had been since Tuesday.

After my good cry alone in a Biggby parking lot.

Every day, I’m a bit better person than the day before.

Every day we’re a bit stronger as a family.

Every day, my sweet husband has healed a little more.

We may look rough. We may feel rough. But every day is a bit better than the day before.

And it had only been a little more than 72 hours.

We know.

This could have been so much more.


Praising God for protection, healing, and for where we are.

Praising Him for His strength in each new day.

Praising Him that I only need to be better than I was yesterday.

Blessings,

Deb

2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

Ten Homeschool Benefits For Youth Using A Family Business

A few weeks ago, the LoveLeavingLegacy crew was honored to be the Lilla Rose vendors for the INCH homeschool conference in Lansing, MI. We got to model what it could look like for families to have a business with low start up costs, and to enable parents to teach entrepreneurship and business skills through a real life family internship at their finger tips, all while reaching family financial goals.

Not all our business working children were able to make the conference. We had some illness the same weekend.

We had a great time, and talked to many lovely families.


Have you ever considered a family based business to teach your children these skills?

What Could Your Youth Learn By Your Family Having A Business?

  • Bookkeeping
  • Marketing And Social Media
  • Graphics and Video Making
  • Product Demonstration
  • Communication
  • Salesmanship
  • Ethics in Business
  • Office Work
  • Inventory Purchasing
  • Money Management

I’m sure there is so much more.


Maybe you are a woman wanting a second job, a Mom needing a way to earn some extra money for the family while getting a night out. What would be YOUR why? Just because my Why is to get to work with my children doesn’t mean that is yours. My Why won’t be my Why forever either.

Our children grow up and start their own lives. But, I have a vision for being able to travel with my husband, care for my parents, travel to see our grandchildren, relieve some burden on my husband, and maybe to do missions. I’d love a job that can travel with us, and building this business now prepares us for a future like that!


So what could you do with a small business? How would it prepare you for your future if it’s not because of homeschooling? And what could you learn with your children if it’s for homeschooling today?

Here is a list of other benefits to a Lilla Rose business:

  • Community and Relationships
  • Extra Income Potential
  • Love the Products
  • Leadership Opportunities
  • Fundraising Potential
  • It’s also Family Owned With Family Emphasis


As my children grow, I realize there is a season for everything. I’m still in a planting season with my children, but I’m also in a harvest season. Lilla Rose has been a huge benefit to us in both planting, nurturing, and harvesting. We are still building through homeschooling and a Lilla Rose business.


Where are you in your seasons?


If you see yourself wanting to train up a generation of entrepreneurs through a low cost start up business, we should talk. If you see yourself needing a hair care system business because you both love the products, need the community, need part time or full time income, or would love a fundraising vehicle, I would love to talk.

Blessings,

Deb

Enjoy this tribute to our Stars and Stripes in Lilla Rose Style with newly released patriotic products, plus the return of former July Flexis of the Month and other limited release products. Also note that all patriotic clips are 10% off, and other select clips are 20-30% off as well, now through Sunday night, 11:59 PM PST. Note also that with a $70 retail order, you can choose an extra small FREE from this selection of flexi clips. Which would you choose?

Credits to United States National Anthem, by Francis Scott Key. Video made with Animoto.

Three Tips For Success In Exercise And Growing A Small Business

Running is on my bucket list of things I would never do, just like homeschooling, grinding wheat and baking bread, or doing direct sales.

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If you recently saw a woman dressed in pink exercise clothes with a gray sweatshirt and black and teal sneakers running near your house, it wouldn’t have been me. I don’t run. I. Do. Not. Run. I might run if a bear were chasing me, or a large German shepherd, or creepy bad guy. If you didn’t see any of those things chasing the woman in pink and gray, then it wasn’t me. I do not run.

If you saw a middle aged woman dressed in pink exercise clothes with a gray sweatshirt and black and teal sneakers running near your house looking like she might be ready to pass out and die, or standing by the side of the road hyperventilating and trying not to cry…that might have been me.

That was me.


I’ve done the thing I said I’d never do, and I’ve attempted to run during my 11,000 step walk.

Hilly Rd I often walk

Google Maps tells me this entire route is 4.5 miles. And, yes, I recognize this only totals 10000 steps. I’ve been doing the final 1000 steps pacing up and down about ten times in my driveway, or I retrace a little bit of the circuit for a cool down.

I’ve been running intervals, but only about 300 steps at a time, and then I have to stop to catch my breath. Each time I try to go a little further than I did the last time, just like when I was building up to my 11,000 steps.

One particular day, on a last hill on Country Rd B, I decided to try one last hurrah, went 300 steps, and actually did feel like I was going to pass out. I felt terrible and nearly cried. My throat was welling to tears, but I fought them because I knew I was beginning a panic attack, and if that happened, then I wouldn’t be able to breathe. Our dog sat right at my feet and Artistic A held me while I pulled myself together.

Later, as I was telling this all to a friend who holds me accountable, I began to feel a new burn, and it wasn’t just the one in my lungs! Last year at this time, I could hardly walk 2,000 steps. Now I walk 11,000 steps, albeit more slowly than I like, taking more time than I like.

But I can do it.

And, apparently, I can interval run nearly 2,000 of those 11,000 steps.

Where will I be in three months? Six months? A year?

Suddenly I have new ideas and new walking/running/health goals. The immediate goal is to walk/run these steps nearly daily to be on track for my weight loss goal with a deadline of July 29, 2017.

What about when I’m at that goal? Will I maintain that? What do I do with my progress from there?


On one particular day right as I went for my I’m Not Going to Run walk, one of my team leaders had posted a graphic with the words “Keep the End Goal in Mind.” I was pondering this while I walked and began to ran.

When I started running, I was looking at the line in the road. Some might say that I was just staying in my comfort zone, not really challenging myself. Some might say the line is what was giving me direction. I started looking up, because frankly after Michigan winters, our roads are in rough shape. There could be potholes and I could twist my ankles. I needed to anticipate the problems or dangers up ahead for course correction. And, I did look at that first hill for which I need to reach the top. It was the goal. At that moment, getting to that first hill running WAS the end goal.

What should we look at: the line, what is just ahead, or the top of the hill? Was the top of the hill the goal? What is on the other side of the hill? Was that the end goal?

I do know what my leader actually meant when she offered this advice, and that it might seem like I’m totally overthinking this.

When I started with my Lilla Rose business, I had no business related end goal for which to strive. Joining Lilla Rose was strictly to provide tools to teach my own daughters how to care for their hair and to do pretty, modest hair styles. Within days, though, once we had the product in our hands, our end goals morphed from just for fun, to an opportunity to give back more to causes, to something fun and relationship building and academic for our own family, to where I am now. This is a real, viable, ground floor opportunity. I can be a tool to empower and train other women to be work at home moms, rather than outside the home working moms. I myself could advance in rank within Lilla Rose and earn a full time income!  Obviously that was not a large hill I considered 3.5 years ago!

There is wisdom in keeping one’s sights on an end goal. But, there is also something to the idea that the end goal might not be what one is thinking it will be. We always need to stay open to the idea that circumstances change, policies in our companies change that affect the direction of our businesses (the white lines in the road), a lot of life happens (the Michigan winter potholes) , and as is my case, as we learn, grow, and stretch, God might actually have something bigger than what we think the end goal is. It’s not necessarily that first, second, or third looming hill!

The immediate end goal is probably not the end goal.


For reaching an end destination

See? No cute pink running clothes here! NOT Running.

1) Be willing to start with the smaller, attainable goals, allowing the Lord to direct your path to targets bigger than what we currently conceive, or even very different than what we initially think the goal is. Be open. Be honest. Be willing to be led and directed.

2) Have accountability partners and encouraging cheerleaders who are going to be honest with you about your progress, or even your lack of direction. Stick with those people who are encouraging you to be the best that God is asking you to be in your business. Sometimes that might mean listening to things you don’t like to hear. Sometimes that might mean disregarding well meaning advice that goes against your personality or ethical standards. We all need course correction from time to time! Know when to stay in your comfort zone, and when to try something new. Use wisdom and discernment about which pieces of advice or accountability are best for your integrity, business, and future.

3) Stay up to date with latest business methods. Pay attention to those who will train you with integrity from both inside your company, and from the outside. Never stop trying to learn, to read, to listen to podcasts, or to inspiration.


 I did it. For the first time since middle school, I ran a total of 2000 steps in one day.

My lungs hurts, my calves hurt, my stomach hurt. The thoughts running through my head were “At this time last year, I felt horrible after walking 2000 steps. I don’t feel horrible walking it, but now I feel horrible running it!” and “My only goal right now is being healthy & looking nice for Equine J’s wedding. But what happens after that???”

Other ideas began to flow, like “Maybe I could run a 5k as a fundraiser for orphans with Down syndrome. Would people sponsor me?” or “Maybe I would train for a marathon!” I’ve got to say that I like the fundraiser idea much better.

Ideas in business flow too, like “Unit director is a possibility for me!” “Maybe I can build my business via this blog to be sustainable. Could I get knowledgeable enough that people would trust my wisdom? What more do I need to learn?”


Right now, I can walk daily or increase my running.  I can take each hill as it comes, and adjust for each pothole as it comes. I can run my business with the best integrity, honesty, ethics that I can while I am still homeschooling and raising children. I can learn alongside my children.

I Said I Would.I Am. I'll Keep Doing It.Keep Watching.

So can you!

Pick your hills, choose your routes, adjust for your potholes. Conquer those goals, one hill at a time, knowing that the next hill will probably be bigger, and still not the end.

I hope you continue to join me in this quest for better practices both in health, in exercise, in business, in faith, and in life, using THE Compass Rose!

My son, do not let wisdom and understanding out of your sight, preserve sound judgment and discretion; they will be life for you, an ornament to grace your neck. Then you will go on your way in safety, and your foot will not stumble. When you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet. Have no fear of sudden disaster or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked, for the Lord will be at your side and will keep your foot from being snared. ~Proverbs 3:21-26

Blessings,
Deb

PS. Announcement  coming made at the end of this last post is still in the works. 

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